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10-May-2016 07:56

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Dating as a single person is one thing; dating as a divorced person with kids is quite another thing.

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I could be out doing something every single night of the week if I wanted to. I'd lived with my parents, and then with roommates, and then with a boyfriend who became a husband.

I was talking to another single friend the other night, she joined this club by way of widowhood.

I told her that I was writing an article about "embracing your singleness" and she plopped down next to me and told me her side of it: "People were asking me about dating within a week of my husband dying" she started. I'll figure out the dating thing later on." My widowed friend and I may have found ourselves in this spot via very different paths, but we both landed on the same page.

"I mean, look-" she held up her left hand, her beautiful wedding band shining brightly on her ring finger. I had been lifting weights and it was bothering me," she continued. Love is something we both want, both look forward to..front and center in our lives are: our lives. I haven't sworn off men and dating and sex and all of that good stuff...

"And right away, I noticed raised eyebrows and the 'you go, girl' comments started." My friend motioned towards the kitchen, where her kids were laughing and messing around with their friends. Being moms, taking care of households, nurturing friendships. Finding our sea legs in order to ride out the rest of this crazy voyage. I've heard that love will find you whether or not you're looking. I've just decided that right here and right now, it's not my number one priority.Truth be told, there are some moments when I feel some envy.



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